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Saturday 15th May 2021
Lockdown day 416

09:10 BST

  Yesterday was very grim. I don't think it actually rained, but for most of the day it looked like it was just about to rain. It seemed to be quite cool too, although the temperature did make it to 14° C by 5pm.
  Today is going to be almost the same as yesterday except today it will rain. It is raining now as I write this ! I'm not aware that any heavy rain has fallen this morning. It seems like it was just drizzle.  It seems that the later revisions of the forecast have just been swapping some heavy rain for light rain, and vice versa. In other words, the forecasters know it is going to rain today, but really don't know when, and and how heavy it will be. Meanwhile we suffer under a gloomy sky ! The other change in the latest revision is that the temperature may only reach 13° C for just an hour or two at the end of the afternoon. Most of the day will be several degrees cooler. Apart for a sunny spell or two early in the morning, the rest of tomorrow is going to be very similar to today.
   The only thing I could raise any enthusiasm to do yesterday was to fast until dinner time. Oh, and I did find the enthusiasm for a shower yesterday morning despite the fact that I knew I wasn't going out, and I wasn't expecting any visitors. All I did yesterday was use any means of distracting myself from hunger pains (and for a while my stomach was really growling). My means of distraction was shared between reading from a book, and reading on my PC.

  My fast was because I needed to get my blood glucose down from it's insane morning measurement of 10.6mmol/l. It worked because just before dinner time it had come down to 7.0mmol/l. Now that was a very nice figure, and lower than my self set target of 7.5mmol/l.

  I still find it a mystery that I am getting some of these high readings when I don't think my diet has changed that much, and if anything I am trying to be more careful during these times. Some of it, maybe all of it, could be blamed on Insulin resistance as a result of increased belly fat, and that in turn could be blamed on my diet being high in calories as a result of ignoring calorific values in favour of low sugar values.

  On the other hand there is a variable that I have observed that would seem to have nothing obvious to do with glucose intake. For most of this month, and maybe some of last month, I have often been semi constipated. I say semi constipated because I don't mean that I haven't been able to go to the toilet at all, but more like I seemed to have passed less than usual. After a few days like that I end up, like yesterday, going to the toilet 3 times in the morning, and each visit produces a substantial amount. Yesterday also added another visit a little while after dinner, and that was quite a substantial deposit. I really don't know if this is the result of diet, or some internal problem. I guess it is diet to a large extent - some days my fibre intake is probably a lot less than is recommended.

  With my blood glucose so nice and low I had no qualms about enjoying my dinner last night. It was the spares portions I had ordered with my Thursday night Indian takeaway. I had one portion of chicken pathia. That was superb - chicken with lentils in a hot sauce. I had about a third of a portion of rice with it. Part 2 was a chicken shaslik. That was basically a chicken shish kebab done in an Indian style. I had a bit more rice with it, but I gave a whole portion, and about the remaining half portion to the fox cubs. They also had the nan bread.

   I didn't sleep that well last night. The Indian spices made me feel a bit warm initially, and I woke up feeling cold a few hours after falling asleep. At that point I turned the heater on low, but maybe around 4am, or perhaps it was really closer to 5am, I felt cold again and turned the heater up full. Perhaps I shouldn't judge my sleep on the times when I was awake, but when I was fast asleep. The trouble is that sleep times were mostly null times when you are not aware of sleep.

  Maybe I got more sleep than I thought. The bits of sleep that are sometimes remembered are dreams, and I do remember dreaming a lot about one theme, although I can't really add any detail beyond the setting which was the old telephone exchange I worked in. I can remember it being cramped and crowded with a lot of contractors working in there installing new equipment, but also a lot of other people. Some of them were people who I would have been working with in my later jobs. One curious thing was rather surrealistic. At one time the building was even fuller while a group of German environmentalists came to visit.

  This morning my blood glucose was back to exactly what it was the previous 2 mornings - a very high 10.6mmol/l.  After it being so low before eating dinner I didn't expect it to be so high. It was even more baffling considering my dinner last night was roughly the same as the previous night, but unlike the previous day when I had eaten, and drunk a lot more as well. In theory I could lose a fair bit of weight if I ate only what I ate yesterday for several days or more in a row.

  The big test of insanity will come today when I shall be getting drunk on a selection of beers with Jodie this afternoon. This time I will prepare my dinner in advance so I won't be tempted to order anything outrageous. However, I will also being having some sort of lunch because I don't want to start eating on an empty stomach. I wonder if my blood glucose will be up, down, or the same again tomorrow morning ? The real insane thing will be if it has gone down. I have a funny feeling it might be.

  I have already said what is happening this afternoon. I don't know what is happening before that. It is too gloomy to go out for any exercise, but I might pop out to buy some dog food for the foxes. Other than that I will be quietly reading and wishing the hours away.
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